HIV doesn’t have to change the way you feel about your body and sex. Many HIV-positive women have partners, who can be either negative or positive.
Talking about your sex life
Many women (men too) find it very difficult to talk about sex. Some women are scared they will be hurt or abandoned if they speak up. Ask your friends about how they handle things. You can get help from a nurse at your clinic, or a counsellor at one of the support organisations.
It has now been shown that the higher your CD4 count, the more likely you are to have a healthy, enjoyable sex life. Another reason why it’s important to keep taking your medication properly!
Preventing HIV transmission
You may wonder how “infectious” you are to a sexual partner (how likely it is that the virus will be transmitted from you to them). Understanding how infection works can help you make wise decisions about sex.
- HIV can be transmitted in vaginal fluids, menstrual blood and breast milk
- The higher your viral load, the more chance you have of transmitting HIV. So taking your medication properly can reduce your chances of passing on HIV
- Having another sexually transmitted infection can increase your infectiousness.
Safer sex
Safer sex can mean two things: sex that helps prevent the transmission of sexually transmitted infections including HIV, and using contraception to avoid getting pregnant.
Condoms, the male and female types, can work in both cases. Some people don’t like using them, especially in long term relationships, or are afraid to ask their partner about it.
Condoms are a very good idea…
- When your partner doesn’t have the virus, a condom can help prevent you transmitting it to him.
- When you don’t know if he’s HIV positive or not, it makes a lot of sense to use one. It’s also good to talk about your HIV status first.
- When your partner is also HIV positive, using a condom can help prevent you infecting each other with different strains of the virus. This is called re-infection and it can make both your diseases harder to control.
"African men when they don’t know you’re HIV positive, they don’t like condoms, but when they know, they use it!"
- Jo, Positively Women, Autumn 2008.
